untitled 1 hour pezberry smut
by ratherembarrassing
Summary: 1 hour tfln prompt swap race. prompt:  703 : When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond. note: i did not know what a chinchilla was, and just decided it was a chihuahua.


Of course they run into each other at the same audition.

They're even there for the same part and seriously, in what universe is Rachel Berry right for this part? None. There is not a single universe in all the universes. Not in the DC multiverse, or the Fringe colorverses, or the— fuck, she needs to stop hanging out with Sam.

They're both summarily dismissed anyway, and whatever, so she asks if Rachel wants to go get a drink. And it's not her fault Rachel can't hold her liquor, even after all these years. You would think college would have buffed the enthusiasm out of her, but Rachel is still all smiles and rainbows and Santana is pretty sure that's how they end up against the wall in the passage to the bathroom, sucking on each other's faces.

What? She likes a little enthusiasm these days.

When Rachel starts to get handsy, Joe behind the bar - because of course his name is Joe - yells at them to get out, and Santana flips him off as they stumble out into the twilight. The bastard will high five her when she's in there next, anyway.

It's fucked up that they've lived three blocks from each other for two years and never seen each other. The bar is basically smack between their apartment buildings, but Rachel's roommate is out of town so that's where they go. Mike's a nosy fuck and she doesn't need every single person they went to high school with knowing about this before it's even done.

Rachel's place is anally tidy, and a yappy little dog greets them as they finally push through the door. Santana couldn't help it; Rachel still wears these super short skirts and she basically had to put her hands under it while Rachel fought with the locks or she would die. No, really, she's a sex shark. Gotta keep moving.

(And she can't believe she's pulling out that old gem right now, but Puck is like the sex devil on her shoulder.)

Rachel just says, "Hi, Cha Cha," and the dog stops yapping but bites at her ankle and this was a terrible idea, but that ass, okay? She ignores the dog in favor of pushing Rachel against the side of the couch, sliding her hands into long dark hair and kissing her roughly, biting at her lip just a bit.

"Bedroom," Rachel gasps into a momentary gap between their mouths. Santana has no idea where they are going, but Rachel's doing a fine job of guiding them backwards, all the while leaving her arms wrapped around Santana's neck, holding them together.

They bump into the doorframe, but that just gives Santana the opportunity to stop for a second and tear at the top Rachel's wearing. She's not doing a great job of getting the drapey, silk and puffy shouldered thing off the other woman, and Rachel just giggles at her - which, fuck, that was probably always that sexy, right? - and pulls at the zipper on the side. Santana slaps her hand away, takes over and finishes the job. Then there are boobs, because apparently Rachel doesn't wear a bra to auditions or something, and that distracts her for a little while.

After she's sucked on both of Rachel's tits until the woman is practically riding Santana's thigh, it's definitely time to get to a bed, and Santana will appreciate Rachel's incredibly hot satin sheets a little later, but at the moment she's a little distracted. Once her shirt, her jeans, Rachel's skirt, Rachel's underwear, and her bra are strewn across the floor, Rachel shoves her back onto the bed, tugs her underwear down her legs and very unceremoniously pushes Santana's legs apart.

Well. Alright, then. She's cool with that.

It shouldn't come as a surprise at all, but Rachel's mouth is amazing. She doesn't start out slow, there's no need at all, she just dives right in, licks at her entrance for a while, her tongue doing insane things just inside her body. Santana's hands are tugging at Rachel's hair, hips rocking, and Rachel finally moves up and covers her clit with her mouth, sucking it between her lips and running her tongue back and forth at a pace that drives her right to the edge. Her back is arching and she's so, so close, when that fucking dog jumps up onto the bed and she jerks like she's having a seizure.

Rachel doesn't even notice, probably because her head is buried between Santana's legs, her thighs over Rachel's shoulders.

The dog just scampers across the sheets - and oh, hey, these are nice, should the dog be up here? - and licks at her shoulder. It's supremely disturbing, this stupid dog licking at her while its owner is- oh god, this is fucked up. She goes to push the dog away, lifts her hand to do so, when Rachel slides two fingers into her, which distracts her for a moment, and then curls them up into her and sucks hard and she comes so hard she sees stars.

The dog stars yapping in her ear, she thinks, but they're ringing a little from her orgasm so maybe not. She also thinks she hears Rachel yell at the dog, once she finally comes up for air, but also maybe not, because pretty soon Rachel is straddling her stomach, dragging her fingers between those damn fine legs and whatever, who cares where the stupid dog went.

Rachel rides her fingers, comes all over her hand two seconds after she thumbs at her clit, then passes out half on top of Santana after dragging a blanket over both of them.

The dog - and who the hell names a dog Cha Cha besides Barbara Walters - makes an appearance a couple of minutes later, leaping back onto the bed and curling up next to Rachel. It's kind of cute and, whatever, maybe she pets her a few times before passing out herself.


End file.
